How can I get my wife to follow through when disciplining our daughter?

She's lazy. That's what it comes down too. Your wife doesn't want to get up and do what she should do. I don't see why any child would just go to bed on there own, without a kiss and a hug and a tuck in but your wife knows she won't do it so she needs to get up, no matter what she'll do for you. She's acknowledge that sometimes it's different between how kids react to either parent so instead of sitting and getting no results she should get up and get results. The reason your daughter doesn't listen to her Mom is because she doesn't have too.