Obese sons are killing them self's?

you are their father you need to show them that you are in charge and get them to listen to you. if your older son treats you like that and doesn't listen then you need to show some tough love. kick him out for a little if you have to but they need to respect you. take away everything they have until they finally decide to listen. dump a bucket of water on them if they fall asleep they need to get active. i know it sounds harsh but that's wahat tough love is about. hope this helps good luck